Kolten James Foster was born October 30, 1998. Born the youngest child of Carlotta and Brian Foster, he was welcomed home by brother, Jacob (then 3 years) and sister, Megan (then 15 months).
Kolten was the perfect baby. He had a pleasing happy personality, sure he cried when he was hungry or needed changed or just wanted held, but for the most part he was happy and easy to please. For all accounts he was normal, he reached for things, and responded to those around him. He hit all of his mile stones on time, or slightly ahead of time, even potty training himself by age 2.
Around the age of three Kolten started displaying some unusual behavior, running back and forth with his head tilted to the side and making odd noises. I brought the behaviors to the attention of our family doctor but was told that Kolten was perfectly normal and that I, being a young mother, was over reacting. I also asked the doctor about his speech but was told that he would out grow his speaking difficulties and be completely fine by age four.
I always made sure to get my children vaccinated on time, and on Friday, November 1, 2002 I took Kolten for his four year check-up; he was given several vaccinations, including a DTP, Polio, and a MMR. By the next morning, November 2, the area where he had gotten the shot was red and swollen. He was slightly crabby for his 4th birthday celebration that Saturday and by that Sunday, November 3; Kolten’s behavior had changed drastically.
The speech appointment was set up for November 14, 2002. The specialist determined that he definitely did need speech services but informed me that he was two weeks too old for their program, if he had been in the program before he turned four he could remain in the program but since he was already four he would have to go through the school. I called the school immediately and was told by the principal that because I had chose to keep Kolten home for another year he did not qualify for services through the school. I later found out that that is not true, if your child lives in the district and you are willing to transport them to the school the school must provide the service.
Through a friend of my sisters, I found that I could get Kolten into one of the best Pediatric Psychologists in the area, all I needed was a referral from my family doctor. So, Brian and I purchased a video camera and I began to video tape Kolten at home to show the doctor his behavior. After a week I felt that I had enough “proof” and I made an appointment for Kolten to see our family doctor. When I pulled the video camera out of my purse I could hear the doctor sigh. I asked him to give me three minutes. I told him if he watched three minutes of the video and still felt I was crazy that I would drop it and never bring it up again. He sat down and started watching and he didn’t stop for almost fifteen minutes, at which time he turned to me and said, “I’m so sorry, what can I do to help?” I pulled the information out of my purse and he had his nurses schedule an appointment with the Pediatric Psychologist.
We spent the next year with her, we did sleep apnea tests and met in her office so she could observe him and all of it seemed to be a HUGE waste of time. Her main goal was to try to rule out autism, she even wrote that on the diagnosis “Trying to rule out autism” and we never got anywhere.
On our last visit she took Kolten out into the hallway. I had told her about he would often run in circles and run back and forth. She told Kolten "Let me see how you run." He said "You want me to run?" She said "yes" and he took off running down the hall. He was four and clearly didn't understand what she wanted. We never asked him to do the pacing and often discouraged him so I think he was just really confused. The minute he ran down the hallway she said "He has ADHD." He certainly did not have ADHD and I decided we were just wasting our time with her.
In 2003 Kolten started Pre-school. The first day was harder for
me than it was for him. A few weeks into the school year I was
talking to his teacher and I asked her if his running and hand
flapping was too disruptive during class time. She was clueless
and told me that she hadn’t noticed any
of those behaviors. I
was thrilled! Until a few days later when she called and said
she had started noticing the behaviors. Kolten finally started
speech in November of 2003 but in January of 2004 the speech
teacher died so the speech classes stopped for the rest of the
year.
During this school year I contacted the Henry-Stark Special Education Office and asked the lady there if they could evaluate Kolten and if we could see about getting him into a special Kindergarten. She spent several days talking to the teachers and observing Kolten and then asked me to meet with her. She sat across from me and said “Mrs. Foster, I know that you want me to tell you that there is something wrong with your son but he is perfectly normal. Might I suggest that you get a job or maybe thinking about talking to someone? A lot of mothers go through this, once their youngest starts school they don’t know what to do with themselves so they invent things that aren’t true, see things that aren’t there, that is what you are doing with your son. I was angry to say the least but decided that I would just put him into regular Kindergarten and not say anything to his teacher.
Kolten started Kindergarten in 2004. Finally, at the age of 6 he started to get the speech services he so desperately needed. Two weeks into the year his teacher called and asked me for a conference. She said that Kolten was a good boy and that she just absolutely loved him but she felt something was wrong. She told me a story about how they had gone to the rest room and she told him to go in and wash his hands and he just stood there, she said she told him three or four times and then it was time to go back to the classroom. She said when they got to the classroom he sat on the floor crying and rocking back and forth. When she asked him what was wrong he said he didn’t wash his hands. She told him he could go in the classroom bathroom to wash his hands and he started sobbing, he said he had to wash his hands in the big bathroom before lunch time. She said she ended up sending the rest of the class to lunch and took him back to the big bathroom so he would feel better.
She hee hawed around and I tried to encourage her to say what she had really called me in there to say and finally, she said “I am not a doctor and I don’t want to upset you, but I have noticed some Autistic-like behaviors.” I was about in tears and I think she thought I was angry, she sure looked surprised when I said “Thank you. It is so good to hear that coming from someone who works with him everyday and doesn’t know his background.” I filled her in, explaining why I hadn’t told her and she was absolutely wonderful. She said one option would be to put Kolten in a self contained classroom but she really felt he would benefit from staying with her and she was willing to do whatever she could to help him. The class was great too. He had certain little quirks, like he had to sit on the number 4 on the carpet and he had to have the green wipe erase marker when it was his turn at the chalk board. She said if someone forgot and sat on his spot or had the green marker someone else would remind them and they would move or hand over the marker. She said none of the kids ever complained. I think that is just so remarkable.
On August 8, 2006 Kolten was diagnosed with High-Functioning Autism. A panel of doctors spent two days evaluating Kolten and came to a diagnosis of autism. No parent wants to hear that their child has autism but in this case, it was something we already knew and the diagnosis actually came as a relief. At least now we can get Kolten the help that he needs.
We had decided to move to Texas during the summer, but we stayed for the Easter Seals appointment. On August 16, 2005 we officially became Texans. Kolten started 2nd Grade at La Vernia Elementary. The school put him into the main stream classroom and they are so wonderful, they have been able to work with him all along the way and give him all of the individual attention he needs.
In 2007 Kolten was in 3rd Grade. He was still getting speech regularly and by the end of the year he was reading at a Kindergarten level!
This year Kolten started 4th Grade. A few weeks ago he had his first spelling test EVER! He got an A!! Kolten is a remarkable young man and Autism in no way identifies who he is. He says "I love you" and means it, he'll look us in the eye when we're are talking (most of the time), and he often gladly gives hugs and kisses, sometimes even to his Aunt Marla, who he loves to tease!
He is doing wonderfully and we actually have noticed less and less of the Autism. He has been telling everyone that he is out growing it and we aren’t going to tell them or him any different! We are amazed by his progress everyday.
To learn more about Autism please visit the Autism Links Page!
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